SPECIAL NOTE ABOUT ROADKILL

This play is not currently available for production and most likely never will be. However, for those of you who may be interested in performing either of the monologues from the play that are available on the monologue page, the information below is here to provide you with sufficient background information to perform them effectively.


SYNOPSIS


Danny lies in the middle of a road on a hot July 4th Sunday afternoon. The road, closed to cars until five o'clock, will reopen soon. Jeff, his best friend, tries to convince Danny to get up before it does. Danny refuses to move. He's upset that his lawn has no soul, and he tells Jeff how he tried to exorcise the demon he believes inhabits his lawn, attacking it with a golf club and power shears. It didn't work, a neighbor called the police, and his father, who has stopped talking to him, is at work, even on the holiday.


CAST OF CHARACTERS


DANNY, mid-teens
JEFF, same age


A TASTE OF ROADKILL

JEFF

Have you talked to your Dad about hiring a different landscaper?

DANNY

It's not about my lawn!

JEFF

Good. I like your lawn.

DANNY

You're an idiot.

JEFF

You want me to leave then?

DANNY

You gonna' call my Dad?

JEFF

No.

DANNY

Then no.

JEFF

Then apologize.

DANNY

For what?

JEFF

Callin' me an idiot.

DANNY

What'd you get on your SAT's?

JEFF

I'm not good with tests.

DANNY

Extended time, and you still got--

JEFF

I have a learning disability.

DANNY

Duh--classes in Romper Room with the dummies.

JEFF

It's not a class. It's a learning center. It's extra help. I'm not a dummy.

(beat)

DANNY

It's the lawn. It makes me do things. I make me do things. Sorry. I take Ritalin. Not Ritalin. Like Ritalin. I was allergic to Ritalin. I had a seizure. Remember when I was out for a week in eighth grade? I had a seizure. I was scared to go to school. I was scared I'd have a seizure in front of everybody.
(brief pause)
Sorry.

 

(brief pause)

JEFF

OK.

DANNY

OK you still love me?

JEFF

OK I still hate you.

DANNY

Cool.

JEFF

Wanna' go swimming?

DANNY

I'm lyin' here right now. Maybe later.

JEFF

I'm goin' swimmin'.

(Jeff starts to leave, then stops.)

DANNY

I thought you were goin' swimming.

JEFF

Water might be cold.

DANNY

It's a million degrees out.

JEFF

Yeah, but sometimes the water is cold.

DANNY

Who cares? It'll feel good.

JEFF

Are you goin'?

(Danny spits into the air. They both watch it land.)

DANNY

That water's ninety-eight point six degrees.
(pause)
Swim.


 

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